My Experience As A Sober Bachelorette
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I just realized I've been so behind on posting this month. This month has been a doozie. The last post I published was in the aftermath of the election and let me tell you, that wound is still open. It's been hard to function, to go about everyday life, and find hope to carry on. This was especially hard for my bachelorette party which had been planned for months to occur on the weekend after the election. In my ideal mind, we would be celebrating my upcoming nuptials as well as the election of the first woman present. It was like I had been holding my breath for three months and I was hoping I'd finally be able to feel some relief and de-stress with my best friends. Unfortunately, as we all know now, it did not go as I had planned. Honestly, on my bachelorette weekend, I did not feel like being happy and celebrating. But I picked myself up and drove down to Marco Island, about an hour south of where I live to celebrate my sober bachelorette. There was a time when I thought my bachelorette party might be in Vegas or Cancun, spent at the hottest nightclubs with bottle service, strippers, and a lot of champagne. I envisioned telling stories of one of the wildest nights of my life and getting the real scoop from my friends because I knew I wouldn't remember most of it. I was always the "go big or go home" type and that's part of the reason I had to quit drinking. Never did I think that I would be a sober bachelorette, but that's exactly what I was.
Marco Island bachelorette party
Never did I think that I would be a sober bachelorette, but that's exactly what I am. Part of me felt like maybe I didn't deserve a bachelorette party, I mean what's the point right? Bachelorette parties are full of drinking, debauchery, and acting like a crazy single woman for the last time. Then I thought back to my first months of sobriety when I promised myself something. I would not let sobriety rob me of fun. I would still live an amazing, fun life and I might even make sobriety look cool. Because back then I thought sobriety was the opposite of cool. I thought it was one of the worst things you could be in life. So when it came to my wedding events, I knew I would have to have a sober bachelorette. I didn't want to be left out of having this important wedding event. I was going to do it my way. I decided to pick a place that had beautiful beaches and wasn't too crazy. That's when we settled on Marco Island.
Although I invited about 25 of my closest girl friends to join me on my bachelorette only 6 showed up. Some said they were going to come and canceled at the last minute. It made me sad, but like my sister has been telling me during this whole wedding planning process "having a wedding really draws the line in the sand for your friendships." You find out who is really willing to show up for you and who isn't. Although this part of the planning process has been hurtful, in a weird way it's a relief. The benefits of having a smaller group at my bachelorette party was that I got to connect with each one of the girls and we were able to have intimate conversations.
On Friday evening we arrived at our Air B&B location and got set up. Then we headed down to the beach to watch the sunset. It was beautiful. Later we went back to the house and got ready to go out to dinner. We picked a cute, fancy restaurant in walking distance of the house. The food was delicious and I ordered a sparkling water with lime to top it off. We had wonderful conversations and some of the girls that attended who are normies ordered a glass of wine, which didn't bother me. After dinner, we went back to the house, chatted some more and then headed to bed.
Day 2 consisted of waking up early and heading to beach yoga at 8:30am! It was perfect. I started the day with a grateful heart, got the blood flowing and our yoga teacher even took some cool photos of us after class. Following yoga, we went back to the house and got ready to go on our lunch cruise. We took the Marco Island Princess cruise around the island, complete with historic information, dolphin sightings, and lunch while hanging out on a beautiful boat. It was so much fun and I even had an alcohol-free strawberry daiquiri. Later that day we went to the beach again, followed by another lovely dinner at a place called DaVinci's. The girls even abided by my wardrobe request, they wear black and I wear white. I wore a sash that said "Future Mrs. Junco," I felt like a real bachelorette! And to top it all off DaVinci's turned into a nightclub at 11pm with a DJ. We were able to get our dance on for an hour or two and we were home by 12:45am. At dinner, my friends went around the table and each one told a story of their first impression of me and what their favorite thing is about our friendship. The answers were beautiful and enlightening. I appreciated hearing them.
On Sunday we went to a yummy brunch and then to the beach to spend the day relaxing in the sun. It was comparable to a "traditional" bachelorette party, but without the hangovers, slurred words, blackouts, regrets, and crazy amounts of money spent. It was fun, different, and fit my personality. I didn't wish I was drinking once. In fact, I was grateful that I could remember everything and spend this special time with my best friends.
When I think about it in the scheme of my life, it's just another form of proof that addiction doesn't have to be the end of your life. You can begin again. You can have all the beautiful, wonderful things, like a sober bachelorette party. I am! Let the countdown to me being a sober bride begin!
