How TikTok Saved My Life

I know what you’re thinking. “What saved your life?!” “Am I reading the right blog?”

Yes and yes, you read that correctly! It’s still me and you’re in the right place…hear me out.

Social media gets a bad rap, especially lately. 

Have you noticed people attributing world issues to social media? I’ve heard people say it brings out the worst in people. We know it can affect teens’ mental health and body image. I’ve personally seen influencers and business owners spend a lot of time growing their audiences over years and curating the “perfect” feed, only to then cite social media as being “toxic” and leave the platform, or unfollowing all but 20 people, and/or pass it off to an employee to monitor. And this always seems to be after they’ve gotten what they wanted - an audience who they can sell to. 

While there are lots of opinions out there about social media, here is mine. Social media has been a wonderful, supportive, and inspiring tool in my life, not just for sobriety, but for mental health, friendships, and job opportunities. Of course, I’ve received mean comments and even death threats. I’ve spent my fair share of time arguing with people in the comments about politics and “stalking” former friends. I recognize if used for evil, social media can create harmful evil and spread disinformation - as we’ve seen with growing communities on Facebook that organized the January 6, 2021 insurrection at the capitol and perpetuate baseless conspiracy theories like those of QAnon and the COVID-19 vaccine. 

I’ve gone through periods of times of wanting to grow my Facebook page and Instagram followings like my peers. I asked for their tips. I’ve tried the organized grid - sharing pretty quotes every so often alongside my selfies and other beautiful pictures, but it never lasted long. I have always reverted back to just posting what I want when I want when I feel what I’m feeling. And while others might have surpassed my follower count, social media still feels good to me. It doesn’t feel toxic. It feels like a place where I get to authentically share about my life and relate to others.

Around 2019 I heard about TikTok. But I promptly avoided it. I thought, “you do NOT need another social media account to check and hang out on, Kelly.” I also made the assumption that it was for teenagers who liked to dance. As you might have seen or heard, TikTok became increasingly popular once the pandemic hit. I ended up downloading the app in February 2020 just before everything shut down and the world changed forever.

Like many users who start TikTok I had no clue what I was doing when I first started using it. I saw there was a timeline to scroll through like anything else and I began seeing a ton of trending songs and dances. I even learned a few of them. At first I thought that’s all there was, but I quickly realized there was more - informational videos, people talking about their traumas, story times, montage videos and more.

I began liking and watching videos and the algorithm did its thing and if you know, you know. The TikTok algorithm becomes very specific! I began consuming content and began to understand TikTok is one of the only places you don’t have to have any “friends,” like other social media networks, you can just consume content you like and never be caught off guard by something triggering or offensive (most of the time). No Facebook articles with misinformation and 25 horrific comments, no perfectly edited and enhanced instagram photos and feed. 

I think TikTok has taught me more in the last two years than any other social media platform in the last 10. First of all, there is something for everyone on TikTok and content creators can post about very niche things and their fans will somehow find them. I can consume news, celebrity gossip, sobriety inspiration, and cleaning hacks all in the same hour. Additionally, if you’ve been scrolling too long on TikTok a video from the app pop ups and tells you, “Ok stop right there - you’ve been scrolling for a while now. It’s time for a break - get a snack, a drink, or go for a walk!” Instagram and Facebook have NEVER told me to leave their app and go take care of myself! Haha.

As you all know - I’ve been through the ringer these last two years and my life has been consumed by grief, sickness, depression, and anxiety. Call it “doom scrolling,” if you want, but there have been times when I could not get out of bed, or have had thoughts that this world would legitimately be better off without me, and scrolling TikTok has saved my life. 

Opening that silly little app allows me to find hilarious content that makes me laugh on a bad day, content that helps me keep my house functional when I have zero energy to clean, content that makes me feel seen and supported as a mother, and content that empowers me to be exactly who I am, in this body, on this day in my life.

I follow content creators who review books, creators who simply talk about their lives, those living with ADHD, some living abroad in other countries, liberals living in red states, a death doula, some that open toys for a living, and others that report the news - to name just a few. But the beauty of TikTok is you are constantly exposed to new content on your timeline (FYP). 

When I feel like I can’t manage my emotions or my life, if I am overcome with dread, grief, or overwhelm, I’ll open TikTok and it feels safe. It feels like home. It’s somewhere on the internet you can show up and just be yourself. No curated feed. No perfect editing. Just random stories and facts that you’ll think no one will jive with, but they do.

Social media is what you make it and if you’re looking for something inspiring and unique, the silly little clock app is it. Sure, it’s got trends and dancing, but you only participate in those if you want to.

I prematurely judged TikTok as somewhere that wasn’t for me, and boy am I glad I was wrong. Thanks for saving me on the hard days TikTok. Thanks for allowing me to find my people and let go of shame. Thanks for letting my heart land in a nurturing place. And thanks for reminding me to go back to my normal life - for a snack or a break when I’ve been scrolling too long.