I cannot believe 2015 is basically over! This year flew by. Here we are on another 31st of the year, thinking about what the next year will bring. They tell you when you get sober that "you will live a life beyond your wildest dreams" and I have come to truly believe this is true. 2015 was a year full of amazing events, travels, lessons, and emotions for me. I look back and I can't believe I actually packed so much stuff into one year!
A new year can be a great motivator, but it can also cause us to make new year's resolutions that are unrealistic and impossible to stick to. I'm guilty of it and you might be too. I was telling my mom the other day that 2016 isn't even here yet and I'm already overwhelmed with all of the stuff I have to do in the new year. I'm going to be planning a wedding, buying a house, writing a book, and working full time among other things. It's not going to be easy.
That's why I wanted to embrace the new year's resolution tradition and set some obtainable and realistic resolutions for the new year.
1. Forgive more
I think I've mentioned this before in my writing. Forgiveness is a hard concept for me. It always has been. I think it's easy to be rude, or just cut someone off, or ignore an issue that makes us feel uncomfortable. It's much harder to confront an issue and forgive, especially if it's us that need the forgiving. I'm guilty of setting too many daily goals for myself and then not hitting them and becoming angry at myself. In 2016, I'm going to forgive myself more. I'm going to understand that I'm human and that no matter what happens I don't deserve negative self-talk.
2. Say "no"
This past year I repeatedly overbooked myself for activities, events, commitments, meet-ups - you name it, I tried to fit it all into my schedule. It's always been hard for me to find balance in that area, but even more so since I got sober. I guess I really feel like I need to appreciate each day to the fullest and do as much as I can. But this can get me into trouble sometimes. I don't think about how I'm not fully enjoying each moment if I'm constantly stressing about how I'm going to get to my next commitment on time or when I'll find time to research something else. Sacrifices must be made. Especially for 2016, with costly milestones like a house and a wedding, I really need to be able to say no to invites to dinner or trips that I can't afford to take. Whether it's my time or my money, both are valuable. Additionally, it's ok to say no! I've forgotten that in most situations I don't owe anyone anything, yet I feel like I do. I'm allowed to say no, no questions ask. As long as it's the right decision for me. In 2016 I will value my time more.
3. Make myself a priority
Going along with the resolution of saying no, is making myself a priority. I understand how important self-care, sleep, meditation, and down time is and I know I never get sufficient amounts of them. When I think about cutting corners in life I always sacrifice myself first. It's finally started taking a toll on me. If I want to be successful in all aspects of my life, I have to make myself a priority. That means getting enough sleep, eating enough meals, exercising religiously, and making sure alone time is at the top of my list. I am so guilty of not doing this enough. And like before, enough is enough! It's time to give myself what I deserve.
4. Be mindful of food
Instead of saying I'm going to lose weight in the new year, I'm making one of my resolutions to, "be mindful of food." I'd love to shed a few pounds and I have an even grater motivation now that I need to fit into my wedding dress, but the real issue here is I don't give food the time it deserves. I'm used to being able to eat whatever I want or doing the quick meal that leaves me feeling full when I'm hungry. In 2016 I want to learn about healthy eating and make a conscious decision to do better, for my body, my mind, and my health.
5. Plan ahead
Ok - this one I need to do as it pertains to work, blogging, and research activities. I tend to sit down and just put my nose to the grindstone without giving much thought to the hours in the day or what needs to get done next week. Next year I want to actually schedule out my hours for everything since I will need to be including wedding planning, honeymoon research, seeing houses, and spending time with my new nephew! Planning ahead should help reduce my stress levels and keep me on track for all the goals I want to achieve in 2016. No more procrastination for this girl!
6. Love more, judge less
I don't think it's a secret that loving more and judging less is a motto I try to live by. But I do find myself judging in times when I think it may be appropriate or if I believe someone deserves it, or if someone has bothered me for some reason in the past. When this happens I need to try to practice what I preach and show some compassion towards my fellow human beings. This includes family members and even people who are no longer in my life. I can walk away when someone or something is no longer serving me, but I can still view people with compassion.
7. Appreciate every single minuscule moment
I've heard somewhere that the moments in life are so important because that's all life is - a collection of a million tiny moments. As I gear up for this next year I know it's going to be extremely busy and I might be stressed quite a lot, but I don't want to miss out on enjoying every single moment. I want to be present in these moments, whether it's choosing carpet for our new house, buying my wedding dress, or watching a movie on a Friday night laughing with Fer, it's these moments that mean everything. I will continue to soak in these exceptional minuscule moments and be grateful for every single one.
This new year will bring a fresh start and I'm wishing the best for each and every one of you. I'm sending you love and light on every day of the year, but especially this last one.