Today I celebrate one year of sobriety from soda! I’m calling it sobriety because it was a hard habit to break and I think I was definitely psychologically addicted, possibly even physically addicted to the sugar. I have always been a soda drinker. I would say I would drink at least 1 can a day, sometimes two. My favorite sodas were Sunkist and Sprite. Obviously, it’s common knowledge that soda isn’t the healthiest drink choice out there.
Read MoreToday I am 31 years young 31 years ago my fearless and courageous mother gave birth to her second and last child. She tells me she knew I would be the crazy one. Shortly after I learned to walk I began to teach my older sister how to do mischievous things, like open the toilet seat lid and play in the water. Another time my mom was running a bath for me and I snuck into the bathroom and turned the knobs to scalding hot, then proceeded to put my feet in, burning myself and screaming bloody murder. At the grocery store I would run down the aisles away from my mom, laughing my ass off, thinking it was hilarious she couldn't catch me and didn't know where I was.
Read MoreThis week Fer and I celebrated our 4 year anniversary. I love this time of year because there are so many great moments that come about all in a row - my soberversary, our anniversary, and my birthday in a few more weeks. This year we went out for a romantic dinner and during our quiet time together we really reflected on how far we've come in 4 years. We got to talking about how different our relationship was at the beginning - toxic, argumentative, and plagued by drugs and alcohol, jealousy, and anger. In particular, Fer brought up one incident that still haunts both of us today. You may be familiar with the before and after photo that's on my homepage where I have a bandage over my nose. In August of 2012 after a long night of drinking, Fer and I found ourselves in a place we frequented often, an after hours nightclub in the hotel zone of Cancun.
Read MoreThree years ago today I sat in the Punta Cana, Dominican Republic Airport, alone, weeping, sweating, and with my head pounding. I was emotionally, physically, and spiritually drained. I was so tired of what my life had become. I didn't recognize myself or my life. I'll never really know why that day was the day that my life changed forever, but I know that something inside me shifted that day. Looking back I know it was the culmination of years of binge drinking and abusing my body. It was the the final straw in years of blackouts, tumultuous relationships, and self-loathing. I knew that it couldn't be all there was. I knew deep down inside drinking wasn't fun for me anymore and that it was the only thing that, year after year, kept making my life more chaotic. I knew there had to be more to life than tequila shots, cocaine bumps, and weaseling my way into the VIP section of the nightclubs in Cancun. I wanted so desperately to have a normal life - to sleep peacefully, not pass out, to travel without incorporating a hangover into my plans, to be able to spend time with my family without worrying about what time I could get away and go to the bar.
Read More"Fun" - double fisting at a concert with a million other people. A little over a week ago I received a detailed message from one of my readers about reaching two years of sobriety and feeling, well, kind of blah. She expressed that she felt that she was finally coming down off the "pink cloud" and that she had been thinking a lot about her former drinking life. She said she is grateful to not have to wake up with a hangover and not be the volatile, messy person she used to be who was surrounded my chaos, but that she did miss being carefree, fun, and spontaneous. As soon as I read her message I knew I had to write about this topic.
Read MoreI got sober and now everyone should be happy. Look at me, I'm awesome. This shit is hard and I deserve support. Sound familiar? I think we have all gone through this stage at some point in our sobriety. And if you haven't yet, chances are you might.
When I got sober I thought everyone would be happy for me and support me, but that was not the case. Not everyone understood my decision to get sober. Some people's reactions surprised me, some did not, and some just couldn't deal with seeing me sober because that would mean they would need to look at their own drinking and using habits. It's hard not to take these factors personally. It's also hard to believe anyone wouldn't want to support you on making a healthy life decision, like choosing not to use drugs or drink anymore. But it still happens.
Read MoreI talk sobriety up on here. That's because 99.9% of the time it's amazing and it has definitely transformed my life. I want more people to know how great it is so they can try it themselves. But I wanted to get real for a minute in this post because I want people to know that being sober isn't always easy. Sometimes it can be hard. That's not to say it's impossible or that you shouldn't try this way of life, but just like in life, there are good days and bad. These are the hardest parts about being sober.
Read MoreThis year I've got two years and a few months of sobriety under my belt. I've done more soul-searching, read more books, written more, and became a proud member of a 12 step group. I guess last year I felt a little disconnected from the recovery movement. I only happened to stumble upon Recovery Month 2014 via a Facebook post and reading the Recovery Month website. I was not yet in a 12 step program and I wondered to myself if I could really call myself a person in "recovery." This year I am 100% sure I am a person in long-term recovery and it's not just because I'm a member of a 12 step fellowship. Over the last year I've involved myself more in the recovery community, especially online. I've shared my story on countless websites and have recently written it for a book that will be a collection of recovery stories. I'm even laying the groundwork for writing my own memoir. What!? I know. I've fully embraced recovery and it's taken me to places I never thought possible.
Read MoreThis post is kind of a bummer. There have been two times in the past few months where drunk men came into our women's AA meeting that I attend during the week. Each time it was handled with calmness and grace. It was clear that even as a women's meeting, we would never turn away an alcoholic in need of a meeting. Both times I felt a bit awkward, but not uncomfortable and overall I felt that the men enjoyed the meetings. One of them even wrote us a letter that a member read out loud the following week. He thanked us for our kindness and he said he was getting help. No harm, no foul.
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