Anonymity in AA and the Age of the Internet

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Anonymity in AA and the Age of the Internet

'm not new to derogatory comments and people who don't agree with me. I learned after the first time my article went viral it's not a good idea to read all the comments. Instead I enjoy the positive emails and messages I receive, while ignoring the negative. After Huffington Post published my article on Monday and shared it on their Facebook page, I got the usual uptick in traffic, email, and messages. One thing was different though. To my surprise, I got about 10 messages from AA-goers who were clearly not happy with me. Apparently my candid mention of "Alcoholics Anonymous" and what its taught me in my 2 year article did not sit well with them. They did not hesitate to tell me their thoughts. Here are a few of the messages:

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Love in the Time of Sobriety

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Love in the Time of Sobriety

“It was the time when they loved each other best, without hurry or excess, when both were most conscious of and grateful for their incredible victories over adversity.” — Love in the Time of Cholera Warning: this post is about love and it could get sappy! Having just celebrated my soberversary, I have been reflecting on a lot of things in my life, not just my sobriety. One of the most beautiful things about my life is the ability I have gained to love and be loved.

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Two Years Without Alcohol

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Two Years Without Alcohol

If anyone can possibly believe it, it's been a whole year since I wrote my infamous One Year Without Alcohol blog. The one that gave me internet fame, a platform to talk about my sobriety, and propelled my writing career. It was the first time I outed myself as a sober person. I was terrified and relieved at the same time. Who knew that getting the crazy thoughts out of my head and into a blog would resonate with so many people? I sure didn't, but I'm glad it did. Now here I am 2 years sober. On May 6, 2013 I took my last drink. Since then my life has done a complete 360. I am a different person. Here is what I've learned so far.

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10 Reasons Why Being Alone is Awesome

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10 Reasons Why Being Alone is Awesome

Being alone is often thought of as lonely, boring, or even a waste of time. I find this is especially true among addicts and alcoholics. If you're anything like I was, being alone is like hell. I thought being alone was for losers. I tried hard NOT to be alone. I surrounded myself with people, parties, drugs, and alcohol just so I didn't have to be alone. I never realized at the time that I was doing this on purpose. It wasn't until I got sober that I realized I hated to be alone with myself. Being alone meant thinking about everything and I hated to let my mind wander. Alone time meant beating myself up, questioning my whole life, my existence, and constant anxiety about where my life was headed. It made sense that I chose to occupy my life with fake friends, nights out at the club, and literally anything else that would keep my body and my mind busy. I couldn't figure out why there were people who actually enjoyed being alone, staying in on the weekends, or even, ::gasp::, people who quiet their minds on purpose.. also known as meditation.

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Break the Stigma of Addiction, Run Heroes in Recovery 6K

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Break the Stigma of Addiction, Run Heroes in Recovery 6K

I’m always looking for reasons to break the stigma of addiction. In fact, I don’t normally need a reason, I just come to my blog and start writing. However, in this case, there is a very cool event happening that is perfect for anyone whose life is affected by addiction. I’m also always looking for fun, athletic events to participate in. If you are a person in recovery or know someone who is, you should be running this race. Even if you are not affected by addiction, but you’re an athlete who enjoys a good race, and contributing to a good cause, this event is for you.

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15 Shocking Alcohol Statistics For Alcohol Awareness Month

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15 Shocking Alcohol Statistics For Alcohol Awareness Month

Often times, people get caught up in the glitz and glamour of alcohol. Cocktails for every occasions, drinks that smell good and look pretty, and the fact that alcohol is a drug is promptly forgotten. That's why once a year it's good to remind people about the dangers and health implications associated with alcohol.

April is alcohol awareness month. This year's theme is "For the Health of It: Early Education on Alcoholism and Addiction." It actually shocked me when I read that Alcohol Awareness Month has been in effect since 1987. What?! Where was I? Granted I was 2 years old in 1987, but I was sober last April and still somehow missed this important celebration. The National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence says Alcohol Awareness Month is designed to reduce the stigma associated with alcoholism. They reach out to the American public with information about alcohol, alcoholism, and recovery. This is a movement I can get behind.

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Sober Fun at Winter Music Conference in Miami

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Sober Fun at Winter Music Conference in Miami

If you've read some of my older posts, you know that I still enjoy a good party and great house music once in awhile. When I got sober, I promised myself that I wouldn't miss out on life and that includes fun festivals, shows, or parties that might include drinking. During my first months of sobriety, these types of events weren't that enjoyable because I was still mourning the loss of alcohol and drugs. I was still learning how to have fun sober and how to feel comfortable sans mind-altering substances. I continued to attend events throughout my early sobriety and now almost two years sober, it's becoming much easier to be sober everywhere.

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10 Name Concepts For Your Own Higher Power

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10 Name Concepts For Your Own Higher Power

Now that I've been attending AA for about 5 months and I'm working the 12 steps, I've had to explore the concept of a higher power. Like I've mentioned in my previous posts, anything with the word God attached to it used to make me cringe. I would run far far away from whatever it was. Organized religion and the word "God" still don't sit right with me, but what I love about AA is that it has nothing to do with religion and everything to do with spirituality.

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Why is St. Patrick's Day a Drinking Holiday?

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Why is St. Patrick's Day a Drinking Holiday?

If you're anything like I was when drinking, you celebrate your right to binge drink on every holiday, or you make up your own to get in more drinking. That leads us to today's wonderful holiday - St. Patrick's Day. It's like this holiday was made for drinking. It's what it's all about right? Everywhere you look it's green beer, bar crawls, Irish car bombs, etc. Marketing has gone crazy around this holiday with green clothes, Hallmark cards, and bar promotions. How did this happen? And what's St. Patrick's Day REALLY about?

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Serenity Interrupted: When an Addict Comes to a Meeting High

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Serenity Interrupted: When an Addict Comes to a Meeting High

This post is kind of a bummer. There have been two times in the past few months where drunk men came into our women's AA meeting that I attend during the week. Each time it was handled with calmness and grace. It was clear that even as a women's meeting, we would never turn away an alcoholic in need of a meeting. Both times I felt a bit awkward, but not uncomfortable and overall I felt that the men enjoyed the meetings. One of them even wrote us a letter that a member read out loud the following week. He thanked us for our kindness and he said he was getting help. No harm, no foul.

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Living in Paradise: Why Addicts Go to the Caribbean

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Living in Paradise: Why Addicts Go to the Caribbean

This post is different from my normal ones. A few weeks ago I was approached by a fellow sober blogger named Marilyn Spiller who I have chatted with via Twitter and blog comments before. I love reading her blogs and I can relate to almost everything she writes. We share many similarities. We both lived in Caribbean destinations abroad, and we're both alcoholics who got sober and now share our experiences through writing. We both agreed on the fact that the Caribbean is paradise living and a place that attracts big drinkers and alcoholics. To explore this topic more in depth we did an interview style blog post together. It was fascinating getting to know Marilyn better and interesting how similar and different our experiences were.

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5 Lessons I Learned From One Year Of Blogging

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5 Lessons I Learned From One Year Of Blogging

A few weeks back I celebrated my bloggerversary. It's been one year since I started the sober señorita, I still can't believe it. Obviously I've grown immensely as a person since I started my blog and my writing has changed as well. I started out writing about living as an expat abroad in Mexico and slowly transformed into being open about my sobriety and struggles with addiction. Throughout this time period I learned a lot about myself and about blogging. Here are some of the lessons I've learned:

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Acceptance Is The Answer...For Dealing With 6 Knee Surgeries

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Acceptance Is The Answer...For Dealing With 6 Knee Surgeries

I've had a million ideas for blog posts and website redesigns for my site lately and I've been feeling guilty for not putting the time and attention I want into it. I blame it mostly on more self-care and homework I'm doing for my AA step study group. Excuses aside, I pushed my topic ideas to the back to write about something more pressing that's on my mind. Next Thursday, a week from today I'll be having my sixth knee surgery. Yes, you read that correctly, 6 knee surgeries. As I've mentioned in previous blog posts, my favorite sport in the world is soccer, and although I almost love it more than life itself, it has provided me with quite a few injuries along the way. I have what's known as the curse of the ACL injury and I'm sure if you've played soccer sometime in your life, you know about this injury. It has haunted me since the age of 16. My most recent injury isn't an ACL tear, so I feel like I should be thankful. This time around, I tore my medial meniscus in my left knee. Also in there is a cyst and a random piece hanging off of my patellar tendon. So next week I'll go under the knife for the 6th time and undergo an arthroscopy to fix these 3 small issues. Obviously, I won't be able to play soccer or do much of anything for a while following the surgery. Approximately 6-12 weeks without soccer, but who's counting?

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High Bottom Drunks vs. Low Bottom Drunks: Who's Worse?

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High Bottom Drunks vs. Low Bottom Drunks: Who's Worse?

Most high bottom drunks believe getting sober and programs like AA aren't for them because they picture a room full of criminal addicts who are old, scary, and dangerous. I know this to be true because it was a silly prejudice I held about the rooms. It's funny what your brain will tell you. Mine told me, "But, I'm not like them. I'm not that bad. I didn't kill anyone. I didn't get a DUI. I still graduated college and got a good job." By achieving goals, acting like you're keeping it together, and hiding your fears about whether or not your drinking is out of control, it's easy to convince yourself life is normal and drinking wine 4 times a week is only a stress-reliever. Their alcohol abuse may continue until some sort of alcohol-related crisis occurs.

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I'm An Alcoholic And You Might Be Too

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I'm An Alcoholic And You Might Be Too

Dun dun dun!!! I know, I wrote a blog just a few months back questioning whether or not I was an alcoholic and I told you all that labels don't really matter. Although I still don't believe the label is required, I do think I wasn't being 100% honest with myself. So I'm here to say that ...My name is Kelly and I'm an ALCOHOLIC!!

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7 Pieces Of Advice For Your First Weeks of Sobriety

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7 Pieces Of Advice For Your First Weeks of Sobriety

When my readers message me or leave me comments, the most frequent question I am asked is: I am starting my sobriety journey, do you have any advice for me? Or, I'm thinking of going sober, what advice do you have for me?

It's hard for me to answer this because it's SUCH a loaded question and I feel like I could go on for hours about it. It makes it difficult to write back to you guys that ask me this because the space allowed in a Facebook message or tweet is minimal and it would take me hours to write it all down. In an effort to answer this question and not write a book, I've outlined what I consider to be the most useful pieces of advice you need to know when starting your sobriety journey.

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10 Tips To Get You Through the Holidays Sober

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10 Tips To Get You Through the Holidays Sober

Woohoo, it's Christmas Eve Eve and the holiday season is in full swing. For those of you who are newly sober, already have some sober years under your belt, or are still on the fence about trying sobriety, this list is for you. The holidays should be a wonderful and joyous time for serenity, gratefulness, and being with your family and friends. This means you can still have a great time without getting wasted and here's how:

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5 Things That Are Cooler Than Drinking During The Holidays

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5 Things That Are Cooler Than Drinking During The Holidays

ANYTHING is cooler. Ok, just kidding, that wouldn't make for a very practical list now would it?

The holidays are a lovely time for being grateful, giving back, and spending time with your family and friends. Of course we all know what else the holidays are good for, and that's drinking. Even though the holidays might get you nostalgic for the drink, you should know there are tons of other cooler things you could be doing. I'm here to remind you of the multitude of things that are cooler than drinking during the holidays.

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5 Things I Learned When My Sister Got Married

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5 Things I Learned When My Sister Got Married

Over the Thanksgiving holiday weekend, my only sister and very best friend got married. I was her maid of honor and had to give a public speech in front of about 100 people aka my worst nightmare. There is a reason I prefer writing, not speaking. Haha. This joyous occasion not only marked a new chapter in the lives of my sister and her new husband, but in my life as well.

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7 Reasons to Be Thankful You're Sober on Thanksgiving

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7 Reasons to Be Thankful You're Sober on Thanksgiving

This year is my second sober Thanksgiving and my first one living in the United States in quite a few years. Last year I was working on Thanksgiving because obviously it's not a holiday in Mexico. Although we aren't doing the normal huge turkey dinner this year because we are busy prepping for my sister's wedding this weekend, I still get to be with my family and enjoy this special day. Thanksgiving is a day when you are meant to reflect on what you are grateful for and the one thing that tops my list is my sobriety. Some sober people and a lot of normies probably think it's the pits to be sober on Thanksgiving, but it's actually pretty amazing. That's why I am taking the time today to write down reasons to be thankful you're sober on Thanksgiving.

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